Here's a quick tip to bum yourself out just in case you ever find yourself too happy. Pick something in your present you hate and see it keep going into the future. Guaranteed, you will feel bad. On the other hand if you see what you don't like changing, you will feel good. I had a patient once who came to me because she couldn't stand her "difficult boss". I asked her why she didn't just leave the job. She said she couldn't afford to leave. She felt trapped and was driving herself crazy because as she looked to the future she saw being stuck with her boss forever.

As part of our work, we clarified her values. (See Life by Design.) She had "family" and "education" as highly important values. Suddenly she realized her current job was affording her the opportunity to put her two daughters through college. Even better, in two years the second daughter would be done and she could leave that job. Once she consciously saw the significance of her job in terms of her values and also how it could change in the future, her boss didn't bother her a bit.

Perspective is a funny thing. It can work for you or against you. But the choice is always yours.

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